Actor Juhi Parmar has not taken kindly to husband Sachin Shroff’s recent quip of being in a ‘loveless’ marriage and took out time to answer the charges. Juhi Parmar felt that this was a public insult and nothing less than the assassination of her character.
Juhi Parmar also felt that this would badly affect their daughter Samairra who is really young.
Here is what Juhi Parmar wrote:
To Whomsoever It May Concern:
A lot of you have been speculating, a lot commenting, a lot questioning and yes everyone has been asking me why have I been quiet? On January 27, 2013 a mother was born and my first priority has been my daughter ever since. A lot has been said but why is my question? We had decided that we would never blame each other, as that’s not in the best interest of our daughter. I had kept my word and always shared the blame for a failed marriage by terming it to be ‘incompatibility’.
I could have never imagined that you will form a base by misconstruing and misinterpreting my so called statements; you have put the entire blame on me of the marriage crumbling down by calling it a loveless marriage. You claim that I have never loved you no matter what and also that only you loved me that too deeply and thus you have called it a one-sided marriage and relationship.
I am shattered as a woman, I can’t get over the shock and don’t know how to gather myself to speak up. And yet I must to protect my dignity as a woman, which has been maligned. I must speak up to keep the respect of my child and tell her that she was born out of love and not lovelessly, as that would shatter the whole purpose of her being.
My integrity has been questioned and blamed by my ex-husband.
I have been completely misinterpreted and misquoted by my ex-husband who claims ‘That I was never in love with him…” I want to ask that when and where have I said those words! When did I ever say that I have not loved you even after marriage? And by calling our marriage a one-sided relationship you have not only crushed and negated all my efforts that I put into our marriage but also insulted me publicly and assassinated my character. If I didn’t love the man I was married to, I wouldn’t have stayed him for nine years of my life and given birth to a child which is ‘ours’. Two decades of hard work to build an image, a niche for myself but today my parents, my family and I have to face emotional torture, abuse and nuisance due to the comments you have made.
In those nine years, twice on the verge of separation and now a divorced wife, I really tried! I set aside my career and everything I had to make this marriage work! Six months into our marriage, I came down with thyroid, which let me tell you is stress induced. I still continued to work because I had to take care of myself, our home and fulfill all the responsibilities that were placed upon me.
I came out of Bigg Boss as a winner and there was work waiting outside for me but you felt that it was the right time for us to start a family. I agreed and our beautiful daughter Samairra entered our world! While I had been your wife, a mother and a homemaker, I have simultaneously also been an independent working woman trying to multitask between it all. But yes, for me my family always comes first!
You claim that you had deeply loved me. A man who has ever loved his wife and child, would never raise a finger on ‘his’ family publicly even after they are divorced. You have been quoted in the media stating that till now you were quiet because you were worried about the implications on Samairra. But now that the divorce has gone through, are there no implications on our five-year-old daughter? Shouldn’t the concern about what we say publicly impacting Samairra and her future remain the same ever after the legal proceedings of a divorce have gone through? Today not only is her mother’s image being harmed but our daughter’s image is getting hampered as well. Will she not be tormented when she grows up and reads comments about herself and her existence being questioned? How will she feel when she reads comments from people who are questioning why she was ever brought into this world? Is this fair to her?
While our daughter’s future is secured financially up till graduation as you say, how could you forget to mention that it’s not just you but both of us who have contributed to the fund equally. Yes it’s a 50/50 affair and not a one sided 100% one as projected by you! And let’s say if anything goes wrong, if there’s a bad day, if there’s a thunderstorm and our predictions financially for the future were incorrect, well that’s all on me! Also the flat, which has been mentioned to have been given to Samairra by you for her future, has an outstanding loan which is to be borne by me. And yet I ask why is it necessary to brag about what we do for our child publicly? We chose to bring her into this world and she is our responsibility – morally, emotionally and in every form besides only financially. Children have no choices, it’s us parents who make the choices! We chose to bring her into this world!
It surprises me when you say limited access to your child pains you. But when there were no limitations what stopped you from meeting her for days or even at times for months? You state that you want our child to have two happy homes rather than one unhappy home but does she? Her father hasn’t taken her to his house in the last two years and let me remind you, I’ve never stopped you from taking her to your house! So where is that second home? You speak about your family’s health taking a toll due to the divorce pressure but have you ever wondered what it’s done to our five year old daughter. The fact that in the past two years she has had numerous doctor visits and countless sick days has just been conveniently left out.
Time and again each decision of mine and it’s repercussions are surrounded by Samairra. If I want, I too could have given away various facts to prove what went wrong in our marriage but all that shall remain hidden beneath in my heart. I still choose to keep everything between us because I choose to keep the integrity of our marriage as well as the integrity of the man who was my husband for nine years and who shall always remain the father of my child.
Half the truth is actually as good as a lie! A one sided fabricated story is actually pretty close to fiction! I know my realities and I know the future, which I must now face with my daughter!
Today I am left to be a single mother who has to bring up her child alone and all I want to say is that I still feel blessed. I am blessed to have my loved ones and my parents who are constantly with me in this journey of single parenting. I want to thank all of you for your support and just tell you to stay by my side as I bring up my daughter as a single mother…..